There's gonna be some cussing in this. I always feel better when I cuss. May has been brutal, and I am hoping for a smoother, happier, less chaotic and, less emotional June. A girl can dream. May has me a bit anxious, slightly shaky, cranky, and looking around in fear at the next bit of bullshit to contend with. I need to throw away my doormat, because I forgot that you NEVER put a doormat with the word "Welcome" on it. You invite things to your door, and beyond, that truly are not welcome. A bit of witchy wisdom there for you.
Since it had been just over a year of owning my car, I made an appointment down the road at the mechanic to have them go over it with a fine-tooth comb and let me know if anything needed to be done. I love being able to drop it off so close to home and walk back and forth! That keeps me from having to rely on anyone else, and is something I will truly miss when we move. But it's more than just being able to walk back and forth, it's the trust I have in them, and the way we've gotten to know each other over some of our horrible life events.
The car got an A+, and this was my first walk of the day. It's wide open across a farm field to the highway, and that view is another thing I will miss. The land is worth it, and gorgeous in its own ways, but some times a soul that feels caged needs wide open spaces and views of an unobstructed sky to feel grounded again.
I have a plan of action here at home to get the house ready for market. I am starting with the upstairs, in particular our youngest sons old room. Windows haven't been cleaned in probably two years, and I removed all nails and screws from the walls and spackled those holes. Vacuumed the floor, mopped it, and looked around. I could feel his energy all the way from when he was a little boy, to the now moody young adult who wants nothing to do with us. I just keep sending love to him across the miles.
Before and after of the window track that sits along the master bedroom roof. It always catches gunk from the shingles and has moss growing.
I moved the monstrosity of a cat tree to that window for Pierogi. This piece will be taken apart once we move, it is so bulky and ugly and difficult to move around. But let me tell you how I really feel about it! 😂
Then I went for walk number 2 down to the library and over to the post office. Also things I will no longer be able to do once we move. I mean, I COULD walk to the post office in the new town, but I would likely not make it there and would get hit by several vehicles along the way.
Our sons room feels so different. So fresh, bright, but empty. Pierogi the cat is wondering what is going on? BTW, I've had that wicker loveseat since I was in junior high. I've managed to hold to on to it through all of the chaos since that time in my life.
It's ok, my girl. We are going to lean on each other, and we will get through this with lots of love.
It's funny how the little things stop you in your tracks. That circle on the doorframe, there's another on the other side, was from the baby gate we had to put across the door when our son was little. When he needed us, wanted us around, and loved us. I am so grateful that I got to experience his love for as long as I did, and I hold out hope that one day it will circle back around to us. But first, he needs to love himself.
After a day of cleaning up and setting up the empty room, I woke up to a morning of beautiful sunshine and decided that I would just go and sit and enjoy it. I was sure that the room was glowing with the sun coming in the East window and reflecting the light color on the walls. And as soon as I sat down, the clouds covered the sun. How fitting.
Getting a look at the deck, and not looking forward to getting out there and staining it. But man, it needs it, lol. I think we replaced the deck (ourselves) in 2020-ish, and it hasn't been stained since. Some of the railings are a bit warped, but I think they are ok to leave for the next owners to decide if they want to replace them or not.
Pierogi calls me back to play. She is modeling this season's mouse toy and says that her booty looks fantastic, thank you very much.
And I am stopped in my tracks again. This house-shaped container has been on the stairs for a couple of decades now. My mother gave it me after she had ordered it, and received it with a slight crack. It held different things over the years, but the mainstay was our youngest sons socks. He would get dressed upstairs and come and sit on the stair and put his socks on. I don't remember now why we started this, but I would assume it was because he might have kept forgetting his socks upstairs each morning when getting ready for school? Either way, it is funny how these routines start and hold, and how they stop one day. One day, he sat on that stair for the last time putting his socks on, and I am a lucky mom that that last time was a day recently, and I got to see it play out time and time again for so long.
We made a quick trip to the land at some point. It is never often enough, or long enough right now. These quick trips are letting so much go undone, but I just don't have the time or energy to fight against that right now. I actually realized a couple of days ago that, crap!, it's nearly June and I never got back out into the forest to pull the garlic mustard or spray the Lily of the Valley. I am cramming a lot into each day, but never enough to get it all done.
We walked the watershed and the clover is in full bloom and hosting the pollinators.
I found Dame's Rocket right inside of the forest again. Not as much as in previous years, but I do need to get back out and check again for any new blooms. This plant is invasive where I live. The four petals and bloom time give it away as the non-native one, Phlox, which would have 5 petals. I have yet to find the phlox on any of the property I own.
It was time to start moving the packed boxes into our sons old bedroom. I realized quickly that I packed a lot of boxes too heavy. It's one thing when you pack it and just slide it across a floor a few feet away, and quite another when you have to pick it up!
Heading back to the oldest sons house, I am DETERMINED to get this damn bathroom done. It's the little things now, mostly all things that I need to do, baseboards that Woodchuck needs to do. We decided to keep the vanity cabinet, and make parts of it fresh and new. One of those things was the knobs and handle. I got these knobs on sale for $2 each. Out with the worn away gold, and in with the satin nickel.
On Saturday recently, I went to a county park to save some plants. Held by the park system that I used to work for, they were digging out native wildflowers and grasses that would be destroyed in an upcoming project they will be working on. So for free, you could come and take as many free native flora as you wanted! I got there at 10:04, it started at 10:00, and they were nearly wiped out. Trunks of cars completely loaded, two people in one family each driving there and filling the car up, then coming back to the table and asking when there will be more. Maybe all of those plants were for them, maybe people were going to sell them (which is what I was leaning towards for those that took so many), but to barely leave anything else for anyone else? I just don't function that way.
I am happy with the three plants I got. Incredibly happy. They are plants that I do not have on my land, and I am hoping they love it there!
Jack-in-the-pulpit (BTW, when I went back to check on them in the forest, something dug this one up 😢)
Trillium
Eastern Waterleaf (native to Eastern States, but I seem to have a lot of those kinds of plants anyway, so why not?). The flower stalk on this one was already broken when I chose it, but I didn't mind.
I transplanted them into one pot the day I got them, and within a day or two, we headed out to the land so I could transplant them directly into the forest.
I have not been back since, and am worried about the lack of water, but I am hoping with the dappled sunlight/shade they are getting in the forest, they won't fry. The sunlight in this photo is likely the strongest they will get, and that is early morning sun.
I am also continuing to knock out little, somewhat stupid, projects here at home. But it makes me happy to get them done. Like these knobs on a little dresser that I took from my oldest sons house that had been left behind. I use it in my sewing room. I got the knobs from a resale shop, and while, yes, I realize a bar pull handle looks best, I loved these knobs and I don't mind how they look on the piece. I feel like they match it better, and are more feminine.
Woodchuck decided not to put the window a/c unit back in upstairs, and the youngest didn't want his curtains because he said they were ugly, lol. So I threw them in the dryer to get the creases out of them because I had them folded and bagged up, and then hung them back up. It might help a bit to keep it cooler up there (they are closed now).
Finishing touches on the oldest sons bathroom, and ever closer to the finish line of this project! A hook for his hand towel that I got on clearance.
His previous vanity cabinet with a new top and a new faucet that I won at an auction years ago, still new in the box. We had thought we would use it on our custom built home, but since we didn't need it, we used it in his bathroom.
New knobs for the vanity. The rounds we got on sale for $2 each and the bar handle we got for $1.99 at a resale shop, still new in the packaging.
A toilet paper holder that I got on clearance at the same time I picked up the robe hook!
We went ahead and hung up the mirror, though I still need to spray paint the frame of it. This way he can actually start using everything. I picked this up for around $9 from a resale shop. It is nearly identical to the mirror on his previous medicine cabinet that he loved.
A quick break in the chaos for some nature therapy. Sensitive fern.
Salsify that went to seed before I pulled it.
The elderly elderberry tree.
And small projects here at home to welcome Spring/Summer and get it ready for market. There was a metal drop-box that hung under this shelf for well over a decade. Initially hung up when I was selling AVON so that I could leave orders in there if someone wanted to pick theirs up, it was on its last leg for the last handful of years. Thank the heavens I thought to stain behind it the last time I did the house, because I was honestly expecting a bare spot there! That would have meant that I would have to re-stain the house because this one we used isn't available anymore. I did entertain the idea of just hanging something decorative there if there had been a bare spot, and leaving the new stain for the new owners in case they wanted to do it, lol.
The trusty ol' canopy. This baby is worse for wear too. Used here at home, and is also the one that I take to shows with me. The once dark green canopy top is now severely sun-bleached and full of holes since we had it up on the 4th of July one year and all of our neighbors were shooting off bottle rockets. The debris landed on the canopy and burned holes in it. We also found debris on our roof tops. This patio gets STEAMING hot even on chilly days, so this shade is a must now that Woodchuck is prone to heat exhaustion and stroke.
The crazy lavender bounced back beautifully from me somewhat neglecting to trim it back until last minute last year. It is not a well manicured plant! It is kind of going everywhere all at once, just like myself, lol. But, it blooms beautifully and provides for the pollinators, and that's what counts.
Back to the land we go to deal with an idea that Woodchuck had to clean up the unused bay, organize, and then eventually move some things to the shipping container. I am seeing the same pattern of managing stuff, moving stuff from one spot to the next, stuff sitting around for years not being used. But one battle at a time. Before.
After. And it looks even more different now because he moved some of the totes and things to the shipping container one day while I worked on my own stuff.
There were lots of lives to watch out for while we moved around. Wolf spider mama with all of her babies on her back. Nature is awesome!
Lots of spider egg sacks and cocoons everywhere. They love the barn!
I took a break when my part was done.
Keep your fingers crossed that the motor is not locked up. (it is, and needs a new engine 😖Bruce is now down for the count).
While he worked on the truck, I saved another spider from a web that was on the tire. Looks like he is missing a pedipalp!
Then I went back to work on my outside stuff. It's mouse-ear hawkweed time of year, as well as ox-eye daisy. Time to pull them, they are not native.
During all of the pulling, I startled a camel cricket! So much so, that he hid well and this was all that I could catch of him in the photo.
But this little caterpillar was brazen and crawled right into an open door of the barn. I moved it back outside into some foliage.
I thought this was cool! The bark literally slipped right off of the tree in a sheet!
We finally have lots and lots of Crane's bill growing here at home that has, thus far, survived the weed whacker.
And on a very rare moment of sitting outside together on the patio and working on art, we got to see dove fledglings, that are nothing more than Dove butts in this photo. Too cute!
But with the heat and humidity, that means nothing will fit me at this time of year. Not my wedding rings, my clothes (I couldn't even get my jeans up past my thighs), or even my sandals.
We worked on some projects that were meant to go to the Gather Under the Pines events, but it turned out that I didn't get a single one of them finished in time.
I did, however, have some leftover soaps that I was able to take with me and I sold 5 bars!
The reason why I didn't get the other projects done was because I had to start staining the deck. I've spent two days so far on staining the floor part of the deck. What a different though! Totally worth the time I am taking! I was SO worried that this was going to be too red. The one we have used originally all of these years has been discontinued, so we got a new brand and a new color!
There is not a lick of stain left on these boards from the last time I did them....which was about 4 or 5 years ago at most. I am terrible at keeping up on re-staining things, but honestly, I think too that the product we used was inferior.
No turning back now!
It is a beautiful view and a beautiful morning! I got outside early to beat the sun coming around full force on the me, the wood, and the stain.
This part felt like it went pretty fast! I stopped when I got just past the door and figured I would go down to the other end and work my way back.
That part felt like it took much longer! And I got bit by something on my leg while doing it!
My knees and hips can't take anymore today anyway, and now the sun is starting to come around. Not bad for day 1!
It also wore me out going up and down the stairs inside of the house to get back outside to move the tarps I laid down on the sidewalk below. I had a friend stop and visit though! Looks like it might be missing a leg! (a type of crane fly)
We have several days of rain ahead, so I will get back out here before then to get it done while the weather is this nice!
Now that Woodchuck is done with his part of the bathroom, it's time for me to get the finishing touches in.
Especially this area that keeps popping back up...and in one of the worse spots for that too!
We were not happy with the choice of baseboard either. It melts when you cut it, or frays really badly and since it's composite, he doesn't know how to clean up the cut edges. Avert your eyes from that drywall. Can you tell I wasn't there on the days he did that? He didn't want to listen to me "bitch about the mess". He still needs to figure out how to get his primer drips off of the floor too.
Well at least these baseboards look halfway decent.
We are slowly moving ahead on the construction loan and it should close in the next 30-45 days. I am just putting my head down and getting shit done. If I stop and allow myself to think about too much right now, I am going to completely fall apart. Best to move to the land first, then fall apart. 😂
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